Most of had no sex education by our parents. All we heard was the “if a boy touches you, you’ll get pregnant” talk. I didn’t hear squat about sex from either of my parents and I am the only girl with 3 brothers, so a lot could have gone wrong. The topic of sex was a topic most Nigerian parents didn’t want to talk about so they pretended that it didn’t exist. I had to basically teach myself sex education and I’m sure most Nigerian or African kids had to as well.
Because we got little to no sex education, most of us made mistakes about sex that we wish we didn’t. A lot of us have vowed to right the wrongs of our parents by making sure we teach our children sex education. But how exactly do we intend to do that? Is there a well thought out plan that we already have in place? I know I don’t know how I intend to teach my kids sex education. I don’t have the slightest clue about how to go about it. But what I do know is that I have an idea of some of the values I would like to instill in my children about sex.
- Abstinence is the best way to practice safe sex, but there are other ways to have sex and be safe.
- Show them their private parts, teach them their correct names, and tell them no one is allowed to touch it or play with it, even mummy and daddy.
- Don’t rush to have sex. You have most of your adult life to do it anyway. Wait till you’re mature and ready.
- To my daughter(s), do not look at sex as a means to an end. See it as an end in itself.
- To my son(s), your masculinity is not defined by how many girls you have had sex with.
- To my daughter(s), your worth as a woman is not defined by your virginity status or your body count.
- To my son(s), no woman owes you her body, no matter how much you have spent on her. Access to her body is a privilege, not a right.
- You can talk to mummy about absolutely anything, with no judgment whatsoever.
Those are some of the things I would hope to teach my children about sex. What are other things you hope you can teach your kids about sex education?